Advice I Would Have Given to Myself Last Year
2019 was quite the year. Across the board, I’ve been hearing that this was a challenging year for everyone, from start to finish. From family and friend drama to job drama, 2019 has not necessarily been kind to any of us, but one of the best things about it being a new year, is the ability to reflect on the year and what it has taught me. I’ve learned a lot in the last 12 months, but the good thing is, all of what I have learned can be used to make this next decade the best ever. I hope that this advice will help you as you approach this upcoming year.
Take Your Time & Trust Yourself
I’m a doer, and in being so, I want to get things done quickly and effectively. While I do think through my plans, at times, I do sometimes avoid taking my time. At the same time, one big piece of advice to myself is that I need to keep listening to myself and trust my instincts, especially about myself. I know myself better than anyone else, and my instincts won’t lead me awry. I wish I could go back and tell myself that all the times when I thought I was crazy, I wasn’t and that I should trust myself and trust my decisions.
Watch Your Mouth
This is not me telling myself not to curse, that will probably never end (sorry mom). What I am telling myself is that I need to learn to not just shoot off at the mouth because sometimes, I don’t think, I just say. It’s gotten me in trouble many times before and now I’m aware of the problem and I want to fix it. Fixing it won’t be easy and I’ll need to constantly be aware of it until I get a hold on the problem, but I’m looking forward to not talking myself into an issue.
You Have To Learn How To Let Go and Move Forward
I’ve held onto a lot of grudges over the last 10 years. A lot of that is weighing me down and after a lot of work over the last year and advice from others, I’m learning when and how to let go. It’s not easy at all, but I’ve got to, for my future. This isn’t just in a romantic sense, but it’s also friends. In the transition out of college, I’ve not been as close to people who I had in my life, even 6 months ago. While that’s hard, I have to keep moving forward and meet new people who can fill those gaps, but also fill them in myself.
Get Your Money Together
If I could go back to the next decade and tell myself anything, I would tell myself to get my money right. Secure the bag. Don’t take on unnecessary debt and do what you gotta do to set yourself up in a position to succeed in the long run. I wish that could encapsulate telling myself to buy $100 of bitcoin when it dropped, but you live and you learn. Always ask for more because you are worth more than you think you are. Stop underestimating your value. Periodt.
Value the Experiences and The People You Experience With
Some people aren’t in your life forever, as sad as that is. Whether that’s family or friends, some people just aren’t meant to be with you through it all. That being said, I am moving forward and reminding myself to love experiences as they come. I never know when people will come in and out of my life, so I’m going to enjoy being with them for as long as I can and just take each day as it comes.
Take Care of Your Mind and Body
Body, mind, soul. Take control of your wellness and learn how to do what you need to take care of yourself. At the end of the day, all you have is yourself and you have to take care of yourself. Just have to keep reminding myself to listen to myself moving forward. This is advice I wish I had years ago.
Love Hard not Fast
This isn’t just in the romantic sense, but for family and friends as well. I’ve had a tendency to go all in quickly and not make things last long. I’m determined to get better at this going into the new year and I wish I could go back and tell myself that it’s okay to take my time and just be in the moment instead of rushing. I need to remind myself to pump the brakes every so often, and it’s not easy to do so.
Read More, Ask More Questions
I used to read all the time! Now, I’ve gotten out of that routine, as I said during my Q1 Books post. Moving forward, I want to read more and ask more questions. One of the biggest and easiest ways to stay aware of what’s going on around you is to just read. When something doesn’t make sense, then ask questions to people who know what they’re talking about. Asking questions will keep me informed about a lot of things I don’t know about. Last I checked, my brain isn’t a supercomputer.
Stand Up for Yourself
Over the last year and even the last decade, I’ve been the recipient of many unwanted comments or touches. This isn’t something new. So many women have stories like mine, but in the moment you freeze and you don’t know how to react. I need to learn how to stand up for myself in those moments. Moving away from harassment, I also need to stand up for my work and my interests. I should be proud of what I do, rather than feeling ashamed at times.
Between 2020-2029, I’ll turn 30, meet so many new people, and undoubtedly move around a lot. All of the lessons from the last year will come in handy. I’m hoping that I can take each of these pieces and move forward with my life and really enjoy it to the fullest. Let me know what you think of this advice and if you find it useful in the comments below.